I’m tired of crying. I’m tired of pretending that everything is fine and I’m doing great. I’ve spend the past years of my life crying and feeling unwanted. Partly trying to make something work where there was no love at all and now having so much love for someone I can’t even be with right now. So much anxiety and I know it’s irrational to keep putting myself in this position, but my old self always creeps back into my own thoughts. When it’s dark and I’m alone and lonely. I fall apart all over again like I’ve been done so many times.. No reason to stay is a good reason to go away..👣👣👣 #anxiety#depression#battle#life#journey#mentalhealth#awareness #fighter#infj#advocate#scorpio #igdaily#selfie#reflection
Journey- n. an act of traveling from one place to another: a long and often difficult process of personal change and development.
I’ve called this an art journey since I began my business years ago. I knew there was always room to develop and better myself.
↟On my journey so far- I’ve developed my art style, grown my business from scratch- let me tell you that is seriously hard. I’ve had to learn SOOO much and there is still so much more to learn. I’ve traveled and seen beautiful places and had beautiful experiences that have enriched my life. And in 2019, I feel like I’ve finally started feeling like I’ve found myself. I’ve become more confident, happy and full of light and life. It has been a serious struggle sometimes to get here, but I know good things are to come.
✘ Enjoy every moment of your journey, good things are coming for you.
⩓ What’s been your favorite moment of your journey?💙
For my final day in Plovdiv last week, I planned something unique, that I had wanted to do for years. I rented a car for a two-hour drive north to Buzludzha.
On top of Buzludzha Peak stands the Monument House of the Bulgarian Communist Party. The remote location was chosen because it was the secret meeting point in 1891 for socialists who founded a forerunner of the Bulgarian Communist Party.
At the opening ceremony in 1981, Bulgaria’s communist dictator Todor Zhivkov held a speech including the following:
“Let the pathways leading here....never fall into disrepair.
Let generation after generation of socialist and communist Bulgaria come here, to bow down before the feats and the deeds of those who came before.” The building never hosted multiple generations of communist Bulgarians. In 1989, Zhivkov’s 33-year dictatorship came to an end, when Bulgaria’s Politburo informed him that he would be executed if he didn’t “voluntarily” resign. Bulgaria became free of communism the following year. Ever since then, the Buzludzha Monument has been abandoned and indeed fallen into disrepair, with its front doors wired shut by steel cables.
For decades it was possible to enter the building “unofficially”, an experience reminiscent of visiting buildings in Pripyat. Unfortunately, local authorities have cracked down on this because the building is falling apart. I had to realize that the unofficial entrances to the building had been sealed shut, either with sheet metal, concrete, or large piles of heavy rocks running all the way down through the stairwells to the basement.
My best bet to enter was a shattered window that had been covered by a seemingly broken piece of sheet metal. However, it was still attached to the frame, and I couldn’t pry it open. Believe me, I tried. I was able to photograph the remains of the front lobby through a hole in the former front doors, and I included a picture sourced from Google of the former assembly hall.
Even though I couldn’t enter the Buzludzha Monument, it was still worth the trip to get a chance to see the building first-hand, as well for the views from the top of the mountain.
We reach a point in life where acceptance is bigger than denial and strength is stronger than fear! Facing a 4th failed IVF sounds like a burden, too hard to accept, yet the only thing to do is to live with it!
Am I upset? Angry? No! Why? Because I trust that I was given the best treatment tailored exactly to my needs with the presence of a professional team, amazing dr. and continuous follow up!
Will I consider a 5th round? Yes! Why? Because I believe that the moment we decide to give up, wonderful things might be taking place! I’m stubborn and I will never get bored fighting hard for my dreams!
I am being too perfectionist? No! How? Because I am aware of the failure, powerless but at the same time I have the choice to either be depressed or stand up, take a break and then try again!
Do you have to react the same way? No! Because every woman is different in the way she deals with struggles! From my side, I’m grateful that I’m capable to do multiple cycles, I’m blessed to be surrounded by amazing family, friends & online community, I’m such a tough mama that will do the impossible to meet this little bundle of joy, whose still searching for me somewhere!
Baby, I’m coming to you, I will find you, and when I do I will never let you go!
Until then, mama, I am working hard, I’m ok and I’m getting even better! #mrsfearlessivf
I'm sitting here literally crying tears (happy ones) 😭😭😭
You guys, I have tried to do EVERYTHING to get rid of my "momma pooch" for the past 2 years and I just came to terms that it would always be there...
Come to find out, it wasnt my "momma pooch"!!! It was my unhealthy gut that was making me look so bloated!!! These are my 14 day results and I seriously cannot believe this myself!!! My stomach is almost (should I even say it) FLAT!!! Day 1 to Day 7 to Day 14...
NO MORE MOODSWINGS, NO MORE STOMACH CRAMPS, NO MORE BLOATING, NO MORE SLUGGISH FEELNG, NO MORE DEPRESSION, NO MORE UNHEALTHY EATING HABBITS!!!! I wouldn't change how I look or feel for anything right now and I am ready to help more people feel like I do from the inside out!!!! Who's ready???🌿
Sure, I've tried it all. You name it I've done it. Queen of yo-yo dieting. Herbalife, isagenix, vegan, high carb low fat and high-fat low-carb. Yeah, I would receive results but quickly put the weight back on and then some, not because the meal plans didn't work but because they didn't work with my day to day routine.
The secret to weight loss and maintenance is to find what healthy lifestyle works for you. You’ve got to find your sweet spot, what keeps you consistent and accountable. I had to be real with myself and accept responsibility for making excuses. I noticed a reoccurring pattern in my yo-yo dieting and that I have problems fitting inside boxes. That being said, I noticed that every time I would restrict foods, I would soon enough fall off the wagon and start binge eating on anything and everything in the house. I was stuck in this cycle until I was honest with myself.
I had to make a change and start being kind to my body and loving me for who I am. I wasn't doing myself any favors with my negative self-talk. In the beginning of my journey my original intentions for working out and cutting calories was to lose weight because I hated the way I looked, but I wasn't coming from a place of love. I was coming from a place of self hate. What's stopping you? Excuses, I myself have made a few of these. I've heard all the excuses, "Oh, I'm a busy mom" "I work 12 hours, 6 days a week" "eating healthy is way too expensive" "I don't have the time." Put your oxygen mask on first before helping others. Once your physical and mental health is on track the rest falls into place and stress is a bit more manageable. You basically transform into a badass just by being kind to yourself.
PS I am beyond ready to get back into the gym! 🤞🏻 I'll be back at it in no time! #weightloss#beforeandafterweightloss#transformation#weightlossjourney#weightlosstransformation#beforeandafter#motivation#loveyourself#nomoreexcuses#journey#consistency#bekind#itsnoteasy#acceptresponsibility
Она как магнитом притягивает к себе туристов, заманивает своими курортами, пейзажами, колоритом, религией, историей, традициями...
Если пляжный отдых, то это Аланья, Кемер, Мармарис и т.д. Там по своему хорошо, но это немного другая Турция. А вот Стамбул это нечто особенное... ❤️ Это огромный город, здесь живёт 15 миллионов человек, вы только представьте себе 😦 Пролив Босфор делит город на две части Европейскую и Азиатскую. Здесь тоже есть пляжи платные и бесплатные, на
мраморном море и Босфоре, но они не такие чистые как в курортных регионах, поскольку это рыночный город, через Босфор проходит множество кораблей.
И просто завораживают его мечети, улочки, рынки, мосты, набережные, чайки, лукум, турецкий чай... А любительницы турецких сериалов обязательно должны здесь побывать, и пройтись по местам съёмок, особенно посетить дворец Топкапы, где жил сам Султан Сулейман и Роксолана. #turkey#trip#journey#travel#fly
Drop a 😂 if this is you below👇No explanation needed. Your personal well-being is so important. FOMO forces us to act against our own wellbeing. You feel involved, but still isolated, you feel like you’re there, but you’re tired, you’re physically present but mentally pushing yourself. Take that nap! Sleep early! Skip that party!
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