Found what is probably the worst gym I have ever worked out in! The plates were strewn everywhere. Some of the machines had seats that were falling off so you have to work your core to balance yourself too. All said, I love the gym. It's as old school as it gets. It reminds me of my primary school gym. Simple. Plenty of locals work out there. And all of them locals work out in either slippers or barefoot! #lelvininbali#keepfitkel
I know I’m only 24 and this may come across as seriously weird, but every time I see a child, I want one too.
I want to be a mother.
Considering how I hated kids, this comes as a shock to me, this feeling. I don’t know when and how it cultivated, I do not recall the moment I started getting maternal instincts but every time I imagine my future, all I see is a baby girl. Running outside from the patio of our wooden house in the mountains, in her pastel green shorts and white sweatshirt, playing with not a teddy bear but two of her favourite dogs. She’s a little strict with them, but quite gentle too; she knows what tone to use to get the job done. Eventually, the dogs sit down. She plays with them in our front yard, it’s a bright sunny day. There’s a few clouds hovering above from time to time but I don’t think it’ll rain. She just has such a flair for nature. She knows when to wear her raincoat or not. Better than her mom. Always so impressive. She never sleeps at night without stargazing for an hour, often asking questions I can’t always answer. She deserves the attic that she’s lovingly claimed. Triangles are probably her favourite shape too. There’s a piano beneath the spiral stairs that lead to her room upstairs. She can’t reach the keys but tries, everyday. I don’t help her. She’ll reach there one day if she is determined enough. But I do, from time to time, play songs to her; in that moment, her smile means everything.
Perhaps there’s a truth she’ll discover one day; I’ll tell her when it’s time. I do not know how she’ll take it, I do not know if the life I give her will be enough for her to understand, how I wasn’t the one who gave her birth, how I lived in a time where it wasn’t ethical to bring a new born into the world. She was adopted. I couldn’t have refused her existence and given birth to a child. For every child deserves to have a good life. And perhaps, one day she’ll know how I didn’t choose her. She chose me.
What do you think? Would you have your own or adopt a child? I’ll also adopt a boy. But for now, I only dream of a girl. 💛
227 3,78810 October, 2019
The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new 💞